XIPs in their personal sphere

One’s family as a reference

Because intelligence is, to a large degree, hereditary, parents, children, brothers, sisters, and grandparents are possibly just as intelligent as the XIP who is actively preoccupied with the topic. And yet acknowledge­ment is not always so obvious, because:

  • Family tradition or gender prescribes a certain role;
  • Everyone makes their own decisions concerning visibility of their uncommon qualities;
  • The uncommon intelligence is not required or developed at school and in working life.
  • A non-academic Xi child can be overlooked amidst typical academic Xi siblings.

Children regularly cause parents to bring up the subject of Xi: Through “deviant” behaviour at school and/or the reaction of the school to this behaviour, past memories are revived. A surprising number of parents, and especially mothers, put in tremendous efforts to assist their children’s development, without acknowledging their own possible extra intelligence. If they are Xi and acknowledge it, they will be in a better position to understand their child, and will also be a more consistent role model for them in the way they manage their being Xi and how they find their expression in the world.
When you acknowledge the treasure chest of exceptional qualities of your family, it will help you letting your own qualities and intelligences loose on the world.

Birds of a feather flock together

Painting 'Family tree'

Mariska Mallee, ‘Family tree’

Although the two partners in a relationship can be widely different in the make-up of their intelligence, it is very plausible that the true love of an XIP is also an XIP. Their mutual attraction is heightened by their shared need for intensity and complexity and by their shared drive. But often the diversity of ways in which each of them may excel can complicate a correct estimation of the other’s extra intelligence.

Certainly in the maternal line of parents, traditional role patterns often appear to have been effective in blocking the development of uncommon intelligence. Solidarity with one’s own dynastic line can then be a formidable obstacle in expressing one’s intelligence fully in the present-day world.

Then there are of course the numerous Xi fathers who were not cut out for a school career. As imaginal thinkers or manual workers, they went into vocational training or straight into a trade. They may reach the top of their profession too early in their lives, sometimes accompanied by appropriate social success, or perhaps they will come unstuck in one-dimensional organizations run by one-dimensional managers.

This subject is elaborated in the Xinasty page of ‘Explore Xi’